In this post Top 3 Tips for Healthy, Loving Relationship, I shall cover 3 key fundamental qualities required in maintaining a healthy relationship between a husband and wife. Romantic and Sexual relationships between spouses are very important for happiness and well-being.
When couples who are in a new relationship or in the honeymoon phase ask questions like – why is it important to have a healthy and happy relationship with your wife or husband and one that cultivates romance? What they fail to realize, while they are in a romantic bubble is that they are lucky to be in that position, but that position will change over time if not cultivated.
Healthy, Loving Relationship established on romance, sexual satisfaction and trust between spouses are very important for happiness and well-being. This kind of approach to this very special relationship develops Love between the two, love being one of the strongest emotions known to human and it plays a vital role in bonding two people together. There are many kinds of love, friendly love, brotherly love etc. but most people try to find its expression in a romantic relationship with a partner – wife or husband.
The ability to have a healthy, loving relationship, one in which both parties are satisfied is not easily achieved and most of us have to deliberately try and work hard to develop the skills and apply them to make our relationship a success.
A quote on the relationship between husband and wife explains it succinctly, I think:
“A Man should be like a child with his wife, but if she needs him should act like a man”
– Umar Ibn Al-Khattab (R.A)
What makes a good relationship?
(1) What you see is what you get – look for GOOD in your partner
Relationship research done on perception and attention between partners shows that we tend to see more of what we look for, so if you are looking for signs of kindness, then that’s more likely to stand out to you. How you think about and the way in which you interpret your partner’s actions, intentions, and words can also affect how you feel and understand a situation or position with them, which in turn will affect how you behave towards them.
ACTION you SHOULD TAKE: Spend some time looking for anything and everything good that your partner does. If you want to keep some secret notes, overtime try only to observe the good things. You will notice in due course, your perception and how you react to them will change. This, in theory, should cultivate a healthy loving relationship
(2) SEX and more passionate SEX – make her/him feel special
No one needs to tell you this but Sexologists are suggesting through their research that great sex life is an indicator of a better relationship and feeling of satisfaction. So make time for each other and take to that bed for some passion. Just think with all those hormones being released who can stop feeling better.
Try not to discuss anything that can deviate your attention from each other pleasuring one another. The man should take lead and make sure plenty of foreplay before letting her have her way. Think of the quote above, act like a man when she needs you!
ACTION you SHOULD TAKE: Everyone’s busy work, children household chores etc. etc. That is no excuse for not making time for you two.
Make that time agree on what you will do together and do it regularly, I don’t mean positions, certainly has to be a variation in that, but spending time between the two of you not discussing issues, instead focus on love, sex, having a laugh and so on.
(3) Be APPRECIATIVE towards your wife or husband
Expressing gratitude to your partner for simple things as well as those big things can increase satisfaction and good feeling in your relationship. The gratitude you show also has a positive impact on your partner. Feeling appreciated, just like any other area of life, if it happens to be by your partner it increases how much you appreciate him or her in return.
This multiplies the effects of how much you feel committed to the relationship and want to out of your way to meet your partner’s needs. Resulting in your partner also reciprocating the same actions.
ACTION you SHOULD TAKE: Say “thank you” even for that cup of tea and letting your partner know how much you truly love and value him or her. Make it genuine gratitude, remember to increase the appreciation you actually feel towards your partner.
Like most things – a Healthy, Loving Relationship does not come easily and needs to be nurtured. Increasing the quality of your relationship will take time, especially when you have other commitments. You have to start somewhere, so make that change today. It’s okay if right now you both are having a hard time.
Start by identifying at least one thing you like about your partner. Then, look for other ‘Good’ things from that point onwards. Also note, more of what you look for tends to pop out – if you look for bad you will see bad.
Happy, healthy relationships do not just happen, each and every couple who has achieved this, has done it with an immense amount of collaboration and hard work between the two people. All relationships have ups and downs, but some factors are more likely than others to create bumps in a relationship.
- Talk and Talk more with each other in a positive way
- Be intimate where and when possible with each other
- Pray together, take walks regularly etc.
- Spend less time away from her or him and when together laugh and enjoy the moment.
- Look out for each other’s, likes and dislikes.
- Have sex and give each other priority when it comes to pleasure
- Learn to forgive and forget. Try never to bring up the past in an argument or lay blame.
Work on your relationship, it’s a learning curve that continues to grow. Enjoy the happy moments and accept the unhappy moments as learning objectives to developing a healthy relationship.